Thursday, June 7, 2012


Good treatment of parents has been very much emphasized in the Qur'an as well as ahadith. Parents have priority in matter of human rights and also they have more rights them others. For instance read the following verses of the Qur'an:

And serve Allah. Ascribe nothing as partner unto him. Show kindness unto parents.

Abdullah ibn Mas'ud relates "Once I asked holy Messenger of Allah - may he be eternally blessed - what  action pleased Allah most. He replied 'To pray at the right time". 1 asked "What is the next action"" He said  "Good treatment of one's parents." I asked "What is the next actionur' He said "Jihad in the way of Allah".(Bukhari and Muslim)

Abdullah ibn Omar relates: "Once a person came to the Messenger of Allah and expressed his desire to participate in jihad in order to please Allah. The Holy Prophet asked him "Are your parents alive:'" The man said "Yes. Both are alive". The Holy Prophet said 'Then go and serve them well". Another version say that the Holy Prophet said 'Serve them and then perform Jihad". (Bukhari and Muslim)

The ahadith tell us that if one's parents need services then he must go on serving them Jihad does not  become absolutely necessary (fard-e-'ain), as serving the parents is superior to Jihad. It is also widely known that Owais Qarni lived in Yaman and desired to visit the Holy Prophet. But since his mother needed his services, our Holy Prophet ordered him not to conic but to take care of his mother. Thus Owais Qarni  could not visit and see the Holy Prophet; however, as a reward for his serving his mother, he was granted such a status by Allah that many important companions asked him to pray for them. When he finally came to  Madinah during the Caliphate of Omar, the latter rushed to him to ask for his blessings.

Serving the parents is normally easy since love for parents is but natural and one is automatically motivated  to serve and help them and take care of them. Then parents love their children and do not wish to unduly  trouble them, or to make them do thing that are difficult. A little service is enough to please them and earn  their blessings. According to one hadith  looking at parents with love has merits equal to Umrah and Haj.  Thus by serving one's parents, a man can earn much merit. Our Holy and eternally blessed Prophet has said

"May that person be disgraced, may that person be disgraced who, finds either or both of his parents in old  age, and yet is not able to enter the Paradise"  (Muslim)

It means that it is easy to earn Paradise by serving, helping and taking care of old parents, and whosoever  doe not do it deserves disgrace.

Mother has been given more right to children's love and service than the father. Abu Hurairah relates: "A person came to our Holy Prophet and asked 'Messenger of Allah! Which one among the people is most  deserving of my good treatment?' The Holy Prophet replied 'Your mother!'. Then man asked, 'Then?'. The  Holy Prophet again said ' Your mother'. Upon being asked the fourth time, the Holy Prophet replied, 'Your  father"'. (Bukhari and Muslim)

It is on the basis of this hadith that the theologians have opined that mother has thrice the right of the father  on her children. This is obviously because mother has greater responsibilities then father in bringing up and  rearing children; her troubles have been especially mentioned in the Qur'an. Moreover, she needs more help  in her old age than the father . This is why mother is placed higher than father by Allah.

Taking care of parents is in any case one of the fundamental duties of man but taking care of them in their old  age has been particularly emphasized in the Our'an.

The emphasis is because in their old age, the parents are no longer able to be of any physical or monetary  use for their offspring and so, often selfish children abandon them. Moreover, in advanced age, one is  sometimes short tempered and their words and whims create resentment. So the Qur'an has asked us to  remember how our parents cared for us when we were helpless in our infancy and how they pampered us  and hence it is now our turn to pamper them, to bear with them with patience and serve them and take care of them.

It is after seen that parents are ignored when they are alive and when they die, they are remembered anti it is  regretted that they were ignored and no care was taken of them. But then it is too late. So every opportunity  of earning for them should be taken.

However, even after their death one can still go on serving the parents. Abu Usaid has related that "One day  we were with the eternally blessed Messenger of Allah when a person from (the tribe of) Bana Salmah came and asked him, '0 Messenger of Allah! Is there any way 1 can treat my parents well after death"' the Holy  Prophet replied:

'Yes. Pray for them, pray for their forgiveness, fulfil their promises after them, be courteous and kind to their relatives and respect their friends".

The methods preached by our beloved and ever exalted Holy Prophet can always be followed.

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